No Exit

"Al fin de cuentas, la humanidad no es nada mas que un sandwich de carne entre el cielo y la tierra."

How do I kindly tell the new people I have just met and want to become friends with that I don’t want to hang out because all of this social interaction tires me out and makes it hard to do simple things like, work, but I really want to be friends with you …?

Tinder date success

Ok no I literally just had someone walk me home and then get super mad that I wasn’t going to sleep with them in return for them walking me home. He got mad when I wouldn’t invite him back to my room and like walked into my house without me inviting him in.. I shit you not he texted “walking alone is dangerous and I wouldn’t have had to do that if I had some place to stay” on his way back and I mean fuck you FUCK YOU

TOO GOOD

TOO GOOD

"So i brought this chick home with me and we were making out and stuff but nah man, it was game over when I tried to get her to sleep with me. I kept trying to convince her to at least do other stuff with me but she wouldn’t so, wasted night."
I cannot hang around these entitled dudes I swear it makes me so mad and sad to know that people like this exist and predominate.

"My cousin just gave birth to her half-illegal baby. She’s married to an illegal, you know, one of those Mexicans or whatever"
RACISM AT WORK

Pro tip: do not eat an entire pound of lentils within the time span of 48 hours— you will be an unstoppable fart fest.

I just typed “Vicky the cutie from that party” into some dude’s contacts and now I want to hide